Anthony Kinyanjui Nene

2020—A NEW NORMAL IN PARENTING

The year 2020 brought so many changes and challenges. Families have been exposed and relationships have been tested.

Parenting during the lockdown due to Covid-19 has been a blessing in disguise to some parents while for others has been a nightmare. During the total lockdown most parents got an opportunity to be with their children full time.

One of the things that some parents have been grappling with is how to relate with their children full time and what activities they can come up with to keep everyone busy and of course getting them out of the way. Cases of obesity have been on the rise, which has come up with lots of health concerns. One reason is very little physical activity among the children and an increase in screen time.

In my country Kenya there has been an increase of Internet usage which has brought a sudden increase of online child sexual exploitation. Many parents don’t how to deal with this new reality. Children are getting involved in orgies all planned online; we are also seeing increases in teenage pregnancies, drug abuse, and even reports of abduction.

What conversations can parents have to forestall these abuses and use the Internet productively during this new normal times? As a coach we can have this conversation.

THE VILLAGES ARE GONE

“It takes a village to raise a child.” When I was growing up this was very true as long as you lived within the village every adult had a right to discipline, correct, train, and rebuke you for your own benefit. This was accepted by all and it was the norm. Discipline was quite good among the children, Character molding was done early and most of us grew up being so responsible.

Phones, TVs, and video games were nonexistent but we had each other. The games that we played were interactive and innovative since we had to make our own toys from sticks, wires, rags, papers, discarded packages etc. Creativity was at the very best and there were no dull moments. The parent's challenge was how to get us back indoors from our games so that we could eat or attend to other duties.

But the villages are gone.


THE CRISIS THAT WE ARE FACING

The world is busy, most parents do not spend enough time with their children. Televisions, Internet, and video games are clearly taking over since they are the only avenue that most children and teens get access to and identify with. Rarely do they know what they are exposed to neither do the parents. Parents don’t understand their children anymore and are faced with parenting challenges, but rarely know how or where they can get the help that they need. Some parents’ ways of dealing with issues are either bribing or blackmailing their children: these are temporary solutions with hard-hitting repercussions which leaves most parents frustrated.

There are growing gaps between parents and their children that is taking away the joy of parenthood. For many parents the issue of dealing with one challenge after another without finding a sustainable solution leads to the loss of their effectiveness as parents and being unable to guide, correct, or teach their children. This can result in the children losing confidence in their own parents. Many parents have lost authority over their children and are using a third party to run and manage their children. It’s sad to note that in some households a third party (who could be a house help or a babysitter) commands more respect from children than do the parents—and this gets worse as the children grow without recognizing the parental authority. Teenage years are especially difficult for these parents and children since communication channels are non-existent.

I CAN SUPPORT YOU TO ACHIEVE THE DESIRED RESULTS

The parenting coaching program that I have been trained on has equipped me to help bring out the best out of the challenges that a parent could be going through. The four different phases that have been tested and proven will enable us identify the needs and meticulously help and support the parent work towards achieving the desired results. This is a positive change process that will be able to bring out the best of you as you as a parent as you move from one phase to another to you reach out to your goals of becoming a better parent who knows how to handle issues as they arise.

My coaching will empower you to use the gifts, strengths, amd talents that you and your family have to overcome challenges that you could be going through and help you connect with each other. Apart from one-on-one coaching I can also provide coaching to groups of parents in organizations, communities, and schools,

Through coaching you will be able to achieve a long life solution of dealing with challenges.