Julie Murphy

Finding Your North Star as a Parent

Being a parent is like being on a great ocean. From the moment those little people come into our lives, we can feel ourselves tossed about by love and fear, judgment and joy. We try to stay anchored in who we are, but the demands of modern parenting can often overwhelm us with waves of uncertainty and frustration.

How do we navigate these parenting waters as we strive to be the best Dads and Moms we can be?

I believe that one of the most effective ways to work through any challenge with your child is by identifying your north star — who you are as a person, what you value, how you show up in the world. The north star holds nearly still in the sky while the entire northern sky moves around it. As a parent, we can best meet the challenges of toddlers and teens and everything in between if we can anchor ourselves and our families in our imperfect uniqueness, still and whole, while the world moves around us.

As a parent coach, we will work together over 10–12 sessions to reset your course toward the family life you want. Whether is it bedtime problems or school issues, chaotic schedules or ordinary weariness, we can work together to reveal the solutions that work for your family. /p>

I won’t give you answers; you could easily buy a self-help book or search the internet for quick fixes. Rather than telling you what to do, I will invite you to rediscover your strengths as a person and as a family, to articulate what it is you want in your life as a parent and to work with me as your advocate to move forward.

About Me

My husband and I have raised three children. All of them are now young adults with their own pathways to careers and, in all hope, with the young wisdom and support they need to negotiate a changing world. Over these 28 years of being a mother, I have experienced profound moments of both aloneness and deep satisfaction: I know I worked hard to grow as a parent with each challenge. It has shaped who I am like no other life experience.

Professionally, I received my Masters of Public Administration and used that training both as a staffer in the US Senate, as the Director of a family homeless shelter and in nonprofit advocacy.

In 2018, I discovered the Parent Coaching Institute and knew that I wanted to retool my personal and professional experience into this new career. I want to hear the stories of mamas and papas. I aim to deeply empathize with their difficulties and to ask questions that reveal who they truly are and what they truly value in their children. I hope to cheer them on as they make their way toward a better future.

How Does Parent Coaching Work?

Parenting coaching with me will involve 10–12 weekly, one-hour sessions. We can meet in person, on the phone, or by Skype.

1. Before the first session, I will invite you to complete a detailed in-take form that will tell me more about you and the reasons you are seeking parent coaching.
2. Then, we will focus on you, your family and your self-care. Over the course of the first two sessions, we will talk about what is working in your family life and delve into ways that you have tackled tough challenges in the past. We may talk about your values and how you parent.
3. Then, in sessions three and four, we will talk about what it is you want. What is the ideal for you in terms of your child and your family life? How do you want to feel about your day-to-day parenting? What would give you a sense of calm and reassurance as a parent?
4. Next, we will spend four to six sessions crafting the steps you might take toward that ideal. It may involve small changes. It might take some experimentation. No matter what, though, the action items we work on together will always reflect your uniqueness as a family and will come from you: your strengths, what you believe in, and how you see your family working best.
5. We will end our time together with a session or two devoted to what is next, what you have learned about yourself, and how you think any positive changes can be sustained.